Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Three Is A Magic Number

What am I thankful for at this time of Thanksgiving? No words necessary. Here is a glimpse of the girl who fills our days as she turned three years old. Never at a loss for words, witty, charming, and caring with a sprinkle of feisty, and strong will to give balance.

Today she asked daddy, "Daddy, when I grow up to be a big girl will you be my husband?" Which was quickly followed up with, "Mommy, I'm gonna be your daughter forever, okay?" You got a deal babe...you got a deal!


Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Goin' On A Lion Hunt!


A Safari through the Ross Jungle began at 10am last Saturday, when 15 of Devi’s closest three year old friends embarked on an animal hunt that with any luck would lead them to a lion sighting. To ensure everyone knew what sort of lion we were hunting for we began with a craft, constructing lion heads out of yellow paper plates. A little glue, paper circles and triangles, googlie eyes and lengths of furry string to make the lion’s mane and each kid was set to begin. It was pretty much instant mayhem as the adults tried to guide and direct the tots to make the lion head just like the sample I had made, when clearly the children were far more artistic and could “see” their own lions in their heads. They did a great job producing a whole pride of wonderful lion faces, each one unique and expressive.



With pith helmets atop their heads and binoculars drawn up to their eyes, we began our animal search. The kids were so cute carefully listening to the clues I was giving to help them know which animal to search for. “This animal begins with the letter M. He eats bananas and lives in trees!” Monkey was screamed aloud before I could even get out the last sentence. Rather than let the children run willy nilly through the house looking for animals, we opted to show Devi where they all were ahead of time so that she might help guide and direct. It worked perfectly as she shouted, “Come on guys, follow me...I know where the monkey is!” And so went our search upstairs for frogs, the main level for giraffes and the basement for elephants.



Finally it was time to find our last animal. The lion. King of the jungle. Devi didn’t know where this animal was, but she was aware that for the past week or so all three of us and Oma had been painting a jungle mural in our garage. I asked her if we had a jungle at our house, she nodded and took off running for the garage with all her little friends trailing behind.

There asleep on the floor in our “jungle” was daddy in a furry lion suit. All the kids began to cautiously enter the jungle. I thought a sleeping lion was not that scary, but daddy got so “into” character that when Devi gently woke him up he roared and scared the children half to death, a few even broke out into tears. No doubt we are now responsible for the years of therapy required to counsel these poor petrified children! Okay, so a bit over exaggerated, but a few kids were a little upset, including Devi - not because she was afraid of daddy, but rather that she was sad for her frightened friends. All was quickly remedied when we began the singing games. We used scarves as tails and sang about them, sang about animal sounds and danced to the “Ziggy Says” song. All the kids then nestled in close to Patrick the “friendly” Lion, and king of the Ross jungle, while he read them a jungle story. It was darling to see him in his lion costume reading to all these little kiddos with our birthday girl center stage in his lap.

Aunt Joan and Oma were our jungle helpers who were instrumental in keeping us organized. Together we served pizza lunch and then had our lion head cake and cupcakes. Lastly Devi opened birthday presents among the jungle vines and all of her little friends, politely thanking each guest. Devi passed out the goody bags that she decorated herself with her hand print as the legs and tail of a lion and paper lion heads glued at the palm. Overall our two hour trip through the jungle went really well. I think Devi really enjoyed the whole day...minus the roar. It was another of those motherly visions that I have thought about for years that has now finally come true.


The following day was her actual birthday and she asked to go to the Old Spaghetti Factory for dinner. Devi has always been very easy to take to restaurants but on this day she was such a little lady. She wore her birthday crown throughout the meal, put her napkin in her lap without prompting, used her utensils nicely and was polite to ask for things. She told anyone who would listen that today was her birthday and would hold up three fingers. She was delighted when our waiter came to sing the birthday song to her, but was baffled that there was only one candle in her spumoni ice cream when she had clearly told him she was turning three! Very sweet.


It is hard to believe that my baby girl has turned three. I don’t know where the past two years and two months since our meeting have gone, but the child who now sleeps in the room adjacent to ours, for all intensive purposes, is convinced that she is all grown up. Perhaps it is her strong will and independent streak that gives this illusion, which brings me to wonder about the personality traits of her birth mother, Jhuma. I know she must be wondering about what became of her Bhargabi. Does Devi look like her? What traits do they have in common? On the eve of the celebration of Devi’s birth we say a silent prayer for Jhuma, who gave from her heart the greatest gift. We truly hope that somehow she is aware that the baby she gave life to is loved, well cared for, knows of her birthmother and today has turned three wonderful years old.
Decorating cookies to take to school for her birthday.

Trying on one of the outfits in the "goodwill" dress up kit mommy and daddy made for her birthday.

Sunday, November 01, 2009

Lots of Tricks and Treats!

Devi: "Mom, on Halloween can I eat Ivy?"
Mom: "Why would you want to eat ivy?"
Devi "Because, bears eat oats, and does eat oats, and little lambs eat ivy!"


We've blown out the candles in our jack-o-lanterns, put our little lamb to bed, picked up the remains of several treats, turned back our clocks and are huddled in front of the fireplace trying to once again feel our frozen toes. It has been a long couple of weeks preparing for the big event and tonight, even after Dev was done going trick or treating for herself (all of a half a dozen houses), she shrieked with delight each time someone rang our door bell yelling out the magic phrase. Handing out treats was just as fun as going door to door for her.

I am not too keen on the whole idea of bringing home 10 pounds of candy, but was glad to find that Devi still has no idea what most of it is. She finds it much more exciting to take it out of the pumpkin and count it, sort it by shape, then color, stack it and then put in all back into the pumpkin, only to start the whole process over again, without ever considering eating any of it. Our dear neighbors always manage to tuck extra special little toys into her pumpkin too...spoiled rotton by them, she is.



Months ago, we somehow arrived on the lamb costume idea which the three of us constructed by gluing cotton balls to a sweatshirt Add ears, a tail and a big pink bow and viola she became a lamb. No matter the age, once a costume goes on, one naturally falls into character. Devi was Baa-baaing all night and Pat and I uttered an occasional "howdy partner" as we were her farmer side kicks.
We had several Halloween activities planned this year, but it all got kicked off by the annual pumpkin selection. We headed out to the Double R ranch this year singing over and over, "I saw a little ghost, and he saw me. I waved at him and he said Boo." Once there, we found a wonderful supply of fresh pumpkins, in spite of the fact that a shortage of them has been reported this year. We also managed to arrive in between rain showers, which was an extra added bonus.


At a carving party, where Devi decided she
wanted a surprised look on her jack-o-lantern this year,
similar to these faces.



Reaching in to touch pumpkin guts.

Dad and I, with our little lamb's help, carved ours at home and
they all made a "pumpkin family" as Devi would call them on our front stoop.



Nothing like a couple of jack-o-lantern pancakes to fuel a girl who will be
trick -or-treating in a matter of hours.




Dad and Dev being goofy with a couple of the masks she made this year.

She is a lion...hear her roar!


Although she really wanted me to go as mommy-bo-peep, and daddy to
go as daddy-bo-peep, we managed to convince her that every lamb
needs a couple of farmer's to feed them.


As her third birthday is just around the corner, we once again see how much she is changing and maturing. These are a few of her latest Tricks and Treats!

Tricking mom and dad is one of her latest fun things to do. She laughs herself silly by singing, "Baa, baa YELLOW sheep..." We play along by saying "Nah...that's not it. Are you sure?" So she'll sing it again with another color inserted . This can go on for hours while she cracks herself up.

We drove by a field of soccer players and birds on our way to music class last weekend and Devi said, "Look they let those crows play on their team!"

Today at coffee time and story time, daddy was reading an animal book to her. Daddy pointed to a picture of a baby horse and called it a colt. Devi corrected him, " Daddy that is incorrect, it is a foal!" A know it all at three...should I be worrying?

The funny that take the cake occurred during bath time last week. She asked if I would soak my feet while she took her bath. I rolled up my pant legs and put my feet in. This is the conversation that followed.
Devi: "Mommy, why did God give me beautiful brown skin and make you polka-dotted?
(My skin has lots of moles).
Mommy: " I don't know"
Devi: " Scrubbing might help", She began to try and scrub off a mole on my knee with her fish shaped sponge and shook her head when she said " I guess He just painted you that way."



Saturday, October 17, 2009

Feeling the Fullness of Diwali

Although the thick aroma of spice still permeates the house, the guests have all left, our Indian princess has been sound asleep for a couple of hours and the dishwasher is washing it's second load of the night. Moments ago, I was soaping up my wrists to remove the glass bangles, purchased in India, that barely make it over the bones of my hand. Each time I wear them, I can vividly recall the girl who sold them to me in Jaipur after teaching Karen and I how to fold in the fatty part of our palm to make them fit. My bhindi has been removed, and the salmar kameez I was wearing has hit the dirty clothes bin after a full afternoon of preparing our Diwali feast. Inside, I am filled with pride and joy; not over any of the little events of the day or my ability to follow recipes in an Indian cookbook. My swell of emotion stems from teaching my child about some of her Indian heritage, the pride she feels in learning and celebrating Diwali and how excepting my family is in learning about this part of Devi that is so important to the three of us. How lucky we are to have been given the opportunity and responsibility to relate this to our child in a way that bolsters her self confidence while broadening our own knowledge. This is a true blessing.

Our Diwali celebration actually started on Friday as we discussed our grocery list over dinner and did our Diwali feast shopping together, picking up the ingredients needed for our six course Indian meal.


As Devi drifted off into nap time today, daddy and I went into high gear to clean, prepare the meal and decorate the house for our guests. When Devi awoke a few hours later, she was ready and eager to put on her Indian clothes, bhindi and bangles and tackle the rangoli on our front stoop. The rain stoped just long enough for us to rush outside and scribble a few designs with our sidewalk chalk that due to our changing weather, will most likely be packed away now until next spring.


Soon our house was aglow as each of the guests, Papa and Gail, Oma, Aunt Joan and Uncle Bill arrived and were asked to light candles throughout our home as a symbol of how they bring light to our lives. The three candles in our center piece represented those no longer with us. Our menu started with cocktails and samosas with mango chutney, bhel puri and a few cashews. Dinner consisted of Chicken Makhani prepared crock pot style; recipe courtesy of Nancy, another adoptive mom. We also prepared a few of our other favorites; Muttar Paneer, Channa Masala, Tandoori Jhinga, and Cabbage Raita, followed with a little naan to scoop it all up!

I wonder if I like this holiday so much because it stresses the eating of sweet treats? That we did! After dinner, we continued our feast with mini pumpkin cakes that Devi and I made, mango ice cream and a box of assorted burfi and jammen treats I purchased from Punjabi Sweets. Throughout the meal we chatted about new beginnings, good health and prosperity all things promoted through this holiday that we hope will come to those loved ones who entered our home to celebrate with us tonight.

With a full head, heart and stomach...Happy Diwali and Namaste!

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Shuffle, Shuffle, Arabesque, Neigh

So proud to be in real dance clothes!

Stating the obvious, Devi has started dance class! The one hour class is offered every Thursday at her preschool and so far the hardest task for both of us has been locating a leotard in XXXS. Although wild in her attempts to accomplish specific steps she is able to pronounce what they are called, but when dad and I try to mimic her, we are always doing it wrong. So far, dancing is not necessarily her forte, but her heart is definitely in the right place as we catch her quietly practicing from time to time and every movement is done with such gusto.


I believe this is an arabesque!

The face given when I tell her it is time to take off our dance clothes.

Busy and stressful seems to sum up the last few weeks for us. What gets us through these times are the thoughts of a toddler that is never at a loss for words

Mommy, when I grow up can
I wear glass slippers?

Mommy, when I have a baby sister can
I brush her teeth and tuck her in?


When I asked what she would like
to bring to school for
Show and Share
day, she replied, "You!"


Devi riding Snickers, the horse all by herself at the Farmer's market.


One of our last nice days I picked Devi up from preschool and we headed to the water park at the zoo. She had great fun trying to figure out that squirting water. I loved the mommy/daughter afternoon and trip out for pizza afterwards.


We took Oma with us to the annual Puyallup Fair in September. Devi talked about riding the carousel for weeks before we went. She was adamant that her horse would have pink on it. Such a brave soul, I was only allowed to stand beside her horse, but not touch it. I tried to get her to wave to daddy, but she told me she couldn't because she needed to hold the pole with two hands. That's my girl....safety first! We did our usual....looked at the animals, pet sheep in the petting zoo, held a baby pig, ate a crusty pup and guessed the weight of this year largest squash....over 1000 pounds!


Daddy and Devi making crunchy pumpkin bars. Crunchy...because Devi got to crack the eggs. Tap, tap on the side of the bowl is no problem, but then when you have to put your fingers into the cracked area to open it, she just squishes them. She does know all the names of the ingredients and is great at helping to measure things. Aprons are a must when working in the kitchen, even for daddy.

Arriving home from a classmates birthday party.
Asleep, but still clutching her goody bag.

Friday, September 18, 2009

We Really ARE A Forever Family!

Forever Family Day, September 18, 2009

Forever Family Day, September 18, 2008

Our first family photo, September 18, 2009, India

Fast approaching is our second anniversary of being together. The minute details of our first embrace are a little less vivid than they were last year, but I still find myself staring at Devi with amazement from time to time, finding it difficult to believe that this life we’ve been sharing for two years is real. Teaching, disciplining, learning, observing, care giving - we are really doing all of it. It still feels surreal, but we ARE a forever family!

We are often asked if becoming parents in this way has become all that we’ve dreamed it would be, and I have to honestly answer that I don’t know. My answer has nothing to do with disappointment, or an unrealized vision, but rather that we never allowed ourselves to risk thinking of life after boarding the airplane. For if, for some unforeseen reason our union did not happen, the heart break would have broken us.

To call an adoption journey emotional is a gross understatement. We learned early in the process that to keep our sanity we must be guarded at each step of the way, for you have absolutely no control over what might happen next. While celebrating the small steps of progress, we always held a little back, never knowing if your hand may be drying the eyes of your spouse or if your shoulders might become the one’s providing the strength your partner needed to clear the next hurdle. Our focus quickly became getting a judge in India to assign us guardianship, but even then, our vulnerable hearts were not totally open to receive a child’s love until our feet hit Indian soil. The day that happened, the magnitude of this journey was realized. We were in the same country as OUR Devi Rose and the time until we were joined could not pass quickly enough.


This is why the two years since that union have been like exploring unimaginable uncharted ground - full of excitement, some terrifying moments, the unexpected and more joy than we ever thought could come to three people sharing our lives together. I can’t recall another time in my life, except perhaps discovering my budding love for Patrick, that I could physically be with someone and have the hands of time stand still. To be with Devi, watching her play, or learn, or overhear her silly conversations with her daddy or even to steal a glance at the stillness of her sleep fills me up. It is a warmth that contents one’s soul, how could anyone ever imagine that kind of magic?



September 18 is here. Call us weird or perhaps creatures of habit, both Pat and I wore, again this year, the same outfits that we were wearing the day that we met Devi. Out to Gateway to India we went seeking a table for three. We had a great meal of Mutter Paneer and Tandori Jinga with all the necessary appetizers and breads to go with. Devi downed a whole mango lassie on her own. All through dinner we discussed our story; how we were told to come at 11 am, how Anju Roy answered our pages of questions and told us how calm and quiet Bhargabi was and how we couldn't take our eyes off of her once the door was opened revealing her standing crib side. At home we sang "Happy Forever Family Day", blew out a candle on a shared cupcake and went through Devi's life book. So these are the things that traditions are made from. Gone is the awkwardness of trying to do it right, or make it meaningful. We are really doing all of it. It is surreal, but we ARE a forever family.

Tuesday, September 08, 2009

Drip Drip Drop....

Only few steps away from the Farmer's market sporting a new raincoat!

Awaking on a recent Saturday to the sound of a light shower tapping our windows, we realized that our sunshine will soon be saying it’s final goodbye, bringing our summer outside activities to a close. Rinsed away was the long acquired layer of dry dust that covered most flat surfaces and leaves, leaving everything with a shiny appearance and an unmistakable freshness to the air. All three of us are true sun worshipers, but I have to admit we all enjoyed a little rain that day. None more so than Devi, who was dying to try out her new rain coat.


Before the weather took it’s turn, we were fortunate to accomplish a few more summer activities. Aunt Shannon, and cousins Olivia and Jordan were in town to attend vacation Bible School at Oma’s church. The classes were held in the morning, so the afternoons were spent with us. Devi is too little to attend, but maybe in a few years.


Zoo explorers - I love that the binoculars are backward!

Cousins enjoying some Rahki love with furry purple bracelets

Our herd at NW Trek

The girls helped us celebrate Rahki with a trip to our local zoo where they became explorers searching for the answers to animal trivia and later exchanged furry purple bracelets to commemorate the occasion. We also managed to squeeze in a trip to NW Trek, a wildlife reserve that gives guided tram tours to it’s guests. Just as we were to board the tram, Devi began an uncharacteristic tantrum with lots of stomping and sobbing. Before we realized what was happening she spat a wasp out of her mouth, but not before he stung her on the side of her tongue. Poor baby was so brave, and other than a slightly swollen tongue managed to enjoy the bison, moose and caribou who flanked our bus throughout the tour.



Helping daddy rip up the old sod

Helping daddy lay the new sod

Part of our new stone patio before mortar.
Devi is wearing the same pair of size 6 month shorts she wore the day after we met in India!


Long in need of an overhaul, our calendar finally freed us up for two weekends in a row, which provided the gumption needed to tackle our backyard. Try as we might to find ways to make what was established work, it just didn’t. Gone went the wooden deck, plants, and the grass got ripped completely out way beyond the roots - we thought it best to start with a clean slate. With clouds of dirt swirling in the air, Devi slept soundly in her car seat while daddy shoveled topsoil into our mini van beside her. That marked the first of the many projects we took on. Devi had her hands in all of it with lots of hand washing in between. She really can’t stand to have dirty hands! Most of her time was spent in her little pool that we set up adjacent to our work area. She was delighted to “cook” for us with her pots and pans in the pool. With sod laid, patio stones down and concrete set we are ready to put in the finishing touches - trees! (something we’ve never had in our back yard before)

Sharing a muffin with a friend at the Farmer's market.

Helping mom with the laundry?

Great Gramma Verna is back in town.
At age 94 she has always been one of Devi's greatest supporters!